Blog #43: Savasana
During my meditations, I often try to summon my mom’s spirit. I imagine my head laying in her lap while she strokes my silky hair. Sometimes I imagine our spirits reuniting in the ethers. My light reaches closer and closer towards hers until we are indistinguishable from one another. Just a ball of light in space. A special kind of warmth reaches across my body, like a spiritual hug. But today, the comfort of my mother’s spirit was abruptly replaced. At first, I felt abandoned by my mom’s light. But then the unexpected happened--
I met a new spirit guide, myself.
She was tall and angelic. Draped in a long, white, flowy dress. Adorned with golden jewelry. Her hair was long and wavy, flowing with a personality of its own. She had my eyes, my nose, my lips, my face. She didn’t say anything, but she made her presence known. She was my higher self. The version of me that’s calm, collected, commands a room. She manifests effortlessly. Expresses her authentic self with pride. Exudes confidence from every pore.
I felt deeply honored to meet her. Once I acknowledged her presence, affirmations started to pour in. She told me to let my insecurities go. To not stand in the way of myself. To accept that I am a success and my life is abundant. To believe that I can manifest everything that I’ve ever wanted, and more. To acknowledge my own light. To see myself in her.
She put all of my dreams in perspective by zooming far out and showing me the world. She didn’t mean to diminish my dreams, she meant to expand them. My life goals are attainable, and I can grow them ten fold. This worldly thinking is her reality, the only way she knows. She touched my heart and reminded me that we are one in the same.
The yoga instructor gently called for us to return to our bodies. I laid still for a moment longer, not ready to say goodbye…but if we are the same person, maybe I never have to. I woke up from my savasana then rolled onto my side for fetal position, symbolizing rebirth into the newest version of myself. This is what growth feels like.
